land, ho.

where are you?
and where did you go
for seventeen days, somewhere lost on the shore?

abandon ship
abandon ship

too many waves are crashing in on this ship.
so abandon it
and watch it sink.
quickly, think:
how many hours does it take for you to come and
rescue me?
SOS
these are signals of distress.
but with your hands full
and your eyes closed,
i can't imagine how you would think of this sinking boat.

seventeen years of water ahead,
with no sign of land, ho.
and it seems to me that i'm the only one
that is watching the sinking boat go slow.
but as the captain,
i am pledged to this ship.
you can scamper off and make a night of it.
if it pleases you
to do so, if it makes you happy to watch a life go slow.
tortured as though,
one can never lay ones head on another good night's pillow.

nothing but sea
ahead of me.
basically, i wish this would be the place you want to be.

'you were the one who suggested it.'

as i sat on the train
with my tea to keep me from being alone,
i listened to the boy who sat infront of me
talking of gizzards and bones.
and as i stared out the frozen window,
floating in his words,
i realized i didn't mind seeing
everything in reverse.

and you say
that one day i'll be okay.
but i don't want to die
on my own here tonight.

in slow motion,
could you see me fighting my mind,
trying to find another's
in a blank sea of eyes?
as i cried in front of you,
i couldn't believe you would agree
with this senseless request
and conform so easily.

'you did what you had to do.'
but the truth is i miss you.

don't move so slow.

sometimes i feel like
don't move so slow.
because each tantalizing moment claws
deeper and deeper into my soul,
like a baboon on a rampage,
scraping away all the flesh and humanity that remained.
slowness leaves scars
and makes my heart cry.

but if things adjust
and day becomes short and night becomes easy
maybe i will forget
the way things used to be.
but quickness is to void,
void is to lose,
and on my light feet
my heart will still cry for you.